Last day at work

It was my last day at work today. I must have been the least-stressed person there with the least amount of work. I am thankful to be working in a job that allows me to sit on my bum 8 hours a day and be nice to people on the phone and face to face.. hahahha . Actually...I think the Indonesian tea lady-cum-cleaner was the least stressed of all of us coz she doesn't have to deal with people. She is so nice, always brings me packeted water and today she made me a mug of teh tarik. She told me to call her when I'm back from Australia again =)

And all of them there think I'm still a student. They say I look young. I wasn't that flattered to hear that, to be honest. =P Must be my short hair or coz I couldn't be bothered to put on make-up, I don't know.

Anyway, it was pretty nice working there and pretty fun sometimes. I'll miss it a little. =)

More work

It's confirmed...i'm going to have to work this week. It's nice that tomorrow is a public holiday!! yipppeeeeeee.....coz it's the Sultan of Selangor's birthday (Selangor is the state I live in). Anyway i'm going to work 4 days this week and that's it. NO more. The lady I'm replacing is still on medical leave. After that, I have 2 weeks left of holidays and then I'm going back to Sydney on NYE coz i have to start work 2 days later...

Anyway, recent picture of my mum, sis and me:

Getting my mum to get in the photo was hard enough. She followed after her parent's weird superstition about not taking photos of only 3 people. Geez mann...it's always like this. How about if I want to take a photo with both my grandparents?? or if there were 3 kids in the family? Pretty illogical...anyway, i made her take the photo by throwing a bit of a fuss....it took me some effort just to put the camera in a nice position anyway!!

hahah...anywayss...i got the photo taken !! haha..

2nd day at work

Looks like I might have to come in to work next week too because the usual receptionist might not come in. But we'll see.... hoping they won't call me actually haha...I miss my holidays.

Today wasn't too bad. I'm getting used to picking up and transferring calls and getting to know who more people are. And today I brought a book to read. Other stuff to do when there is nothing to do is to read all the forwarded emails, daydream, just write stuff and do more thinking. The HR person who taught me stuff said i could pass my time by maybe reading the newspaper or something....u know lahh how to pass time, she said. And u know, now i understand why i've seen receptionists with magazines in their drawers or reading a book at their desk.

And yeah, it's nice to smile at the receptionist. ..and say hello or bye to them. A little friendliness is nice. Since yesterday, there were some people coming in for interviews for managerial positions as well. Chatted to one yesterday and this man who came late this morning, after his one hour interview suddenly came up and asked my name and thanked me. Maybe the MD was behind him ...but it was a nice gesture.

Anyway, here is a photo of me with Noni and Boe.

Yeah, Boe actually came into the house...my father must have let her in. But miraculously she didn't bite off the Christmas ball decorations.

Noni.

She was from my grandfather's and guess what...she has given birth to 10 puppies before. But I like her the best...she's so small and cute and she stands on her hind legs and licks you gently and she's nice to touch. Not so hairy and salivary. And she doesn't jump up you so crazily like Boe.

Temp job

Guess what? I started work today as a receptionist at EPSON (Japanese company making printers, cartridges, scanners etc). But only for 3 days....unless she calls me next week to come in again.

It's my first time being a receptionist....and....it was so boring, especially when I didn't have calls to answer. Getting used to the switch board and transferring calls to all these people wasn't boring ...it took some time. One person even called up wanting to make a complaint to the head of Sales, and when I told him I'd refer him to Customer Service, he was like, what's the point? If something doesn't happen, he's just going to call the police.

Anyway, it was okay....if I was a permanent long-term receptionist, I'd make a lot of effort to get to know everyone's names, but since I'm only working for a very short time, I don't really have to learn a whole heap of other stuff as well. At the food company I work at in Sydney, we have the bestest receptionist. Her name is Odette and she is such a sweet friendly lady. She knows allllll our names....even "lowly" casual workers like me and my friends and she learned how to pronounce my name correctly without even being taught by me. And she says hello Sze Wen to me everytime and smiles.

Hearing all these computer products and problems is also a new thing to me. I don't like all these computer technicalities very much....don't even know about them very much.

Anyway, it was an overall not too difficult job even though it was so so so boring at times. Every time I do an administration kinda job, it reminds me again why I don't want to work an office job. Looking at the people in there....I don't want to work like that either...

okay...gotta jet...meeting Robyn, my roomate in Taiwan...she's here in KL!!

Eckankar

Last Sunday, just followed my mum after church to have lunch with a couple of her friends. I learned of a new spiritual group one friend is a part of. It's called Eckankar(http://www.eckankar.org/)

Sounded strange. I think I'm surrounded by and hear mostly about the major religions in the world and sometimes about the smaller sects but not much. So when she said she just went to Singapore for such a spiritual conference, it was a surprise. She says that her parents are a part of the movement too, that's how she got in it. And she's done a lot of personal research herself and has found it to make a lot of sense. It has opened her mind to how she sees the world.

Some of us can say that about the belief we follow too, huh? We strongly believe where we stand but let me ask:

- do we believe because we had some kind of spiritual experience?
- do we believe because some people showed us so much love and we were attracted to this aspect and decided to follow their faith?

If some people of another religion had shown us this love, would we have followed this religion instead? or if our parents grew up in another religion?
Or if we attended a conference of Eckankar and experienced some kinda revolutionary enlightenment?

So, what can make us decide among religions? Everybody will come up with reasonings or evidence. Which evidence seems more rational? Have we inspected the evidence? Are we also being judgmental? By just inspecting our evidence but not considering the reasonings of others? And if we have no religion...have we inspected the evidence?

And not comparing and seeing which suits our life and our view of the world. BUT which is the truth.

Boe

Isn't Boe a cutie? she's a German Shepherd, born on June 2006.

Boe playing with Marshall (the older German Shepherd). She was so small when she first came, my dad could hold her up in one hand.

BUT....look at her now..

I swear that's her. She's so big already huh? But she isn't as big as Marshall, of course. Boe & Marshall sleeping outside.

When I came back to KL, she was already big....And if you think she's a nice quiet obedient doggy, think again. In my brother's words...she is "playful". She jumps up so much and when i first came back, used to want to bite my ankles. She bites almost everything, even pulled down my mum's clothes (which was being hung up to dry). She has already ripped apart her tennis ball, have to give her another one now.

she is a naughtyyyy dogggyyyyyyy....needs some major discipline.

My dad allows her in the house...When she started biting the pillows, i really had to pull them away and beat her with them if she proceeded on doing the same thing. I haven't shown my mum these photos...she'll probably go ballistic. She already gets cranky over Boe. Plus she doesn't like dogs in the house.

And we just put up our Christmas tree. Fe said that when Boe comes in to the house and sees the ornaments on the tree, especially the shiny metal balls, she's going to go "..ahhhh...more balls to play with now!!"....hahah..and then my brother will go ballistic. He bought a new set of pretty pink ornaments a couple of years ago which cost A LOT.

Somebody better not let Boe in the house..

:P

Movie: "I Not Stupid"

Last year, I watched the first movie (I think made in 2002) and I just recently finished watched the second movie. They're not related but the ultimate aim of the stories is the same.

The movie looks at how Singaporean families are like these days.

For eg., the rich family. Both parents are career people and because of that, their children are neglected. They spend more time at work, and they get easily frustrated with their children.

Anyway, I found the movies so funny at times, and also so sad at times. The parents love their children but they show it in different ways, ways that can be so detrimental. It made me feel for the poor kids, and tell myself I never want to be that kinda parent.

But it's always the case that we see that we don't want to be like that, or we're not like that. But when we examine ourselves, we are actually treating our kids in a similar way.

Great movie.!! i loved it :)

and it doesn't just reflect how some Singaporean families are like, but also how a lot of Asian families are like these days.

It rains everyday

Can you believe that?

it just started raining. Time now: 2.45 pm

THe sky is grey and gloomy and crying its eyes out.
And last Friday, our phone line (which is used for the Internet and fax machine) got cut off coz of the thunderstorm.

Rain...rain, when will u go away...

about a cow

My brother is funny.

On the back pages of my diary, i write sometimes things I have to do for the day/week. And so I opened it 2 days ago and there i saw something that wasn't my writing.

3. Jump off the KL tower on 31/12/2006 at 11.59 pm. Remember to leave all belongings/money etc to (him).

Or something along those lines. That cow...

And yesterday morning, I was beside him on his bed and he asked me to pass him his h.p. I thought it was his HP Compaq laptop on the chair...and so i just said it was too heavy. WHy u need it for? Get it yourself! and then he said...my handphone lahh.

OHHHhh.....geez ...only eksi (arrogant) people talk in abbreviations mann...

anyway i found this very funny hahah

I've been going to the gym lately as well with my dad!! Actually, I've only been twice. But since I got a one-week free trial, I'll try to do go everyday or almost everyday. THe people there seriously go all out to try to get you to sign up as a member. But anyway,i think it's way too expensive. Hmm..or i might just join for a month...i'll see. Afterwards, I'm going again but this time, i want to go for the classes. My legs are still a little bit sore from yesterday...that's what I get for not having done any exercise lately....laziness to the core...

Joni, i hold u as my inspiration to going to the gym...:D
and as a form of encouragement to get my dad to go...he is way too fat and his stomach is way too big....

rain rain everyday

Okay sorry for the previous whinging post... i usually regret public whinges

Anyway, it's been raining here everyday since I got back seriously. Today it rained for a bit in the afternoon at about 1 pm, and then it rained again at about 5 pm... but it's made the weather cool and it isn't too hot. My brothers are going to start work soon. They're in the process of deciding which jobs to take and further job interviews.

I am thinking of going back to Sydney after Christmas but I might go back earlier if I am required to. Seems like a long way away. I'm looking forward to this Medic Camp organised by a few Rotarian clubs in a Tamil Primary School at the end of November. My mum is part of the Rotary Club now, and I just followed her to their breakfast meeting last Saturday. Basically, the medic camp involves giving medical check-ups to kids including dental checkups, blood checks and we even have a physiotherapist at hand. So, I'll be accompanying my mum to help out with stuff there.

okay time for bed now...nite nite
:)

time is passing so slow

feeling kinda down now...

and a lot of things here are irritating me...i feel like i'm shrivelling down into a sinking abyss of godlessness..and i'm part of that what with my impatience..

can't stand all the talk about business, money is important, make friends to see what we can gain, and all that bullcrap. Something is so wrong about all that talk, and how this world is becoming. I'm disagreeing with it but at the same time, getting so annoyed and wishing i don't have to deal with all this...Getting annoyed with how some ppl talk..even if it's not about business.

Yes, yes money is important...i'm probably stupid for being a rebel. I'm not an open rebel..i'll just listen and keep quiet and not burst out too much.. coz it doesnt mean my opinions are right.

I think that's one of the reasons i'm doing in australia...running away from these issues and other stupid problems i can't stand. The more i'm here, the angrier i become....or usually, i just switch off.. When I'm in Australia, i feel bad coz i'm not here but once I'm here, i wish i was back... away and independent. I wish life was simpler, easy and I didn't have to talk money and politics and other intellectual stuff and important necessary stuff.

But anyway, lest you think i'm really angry, and everything is getting on my impatient nerves, that's not the case all the time.

Yesterday night, I followed my uncle to send my maternal grandparents off to the airport as they were going on a holiday to Australia (Melbourne, Brisbane and Sydney) to visit their children and grandchildren. Everytime I see them, my chinese deteriorates even more before i meet them and when i speak to them, i tell myself i should spend more time with them so my Hakka could improve. My uncle took me home after that and we spoke all the way. We have never talked like that ever before. He used to monkey around with us sometimes when we were younger but then after awhile, our relationship changed and we didn't even speak. He even gave me his wife's mobile number so I could call her and visit her and my little cousins.

I'll do that...i'd like to spend more time with my family and relatives this time round. I haven't even called any of my friends.

Back in Malaysia

Everything's like back to normal. My grandfather's house as well....thank goodness, they took pictures, so i could see how it was like. My cousin told me most of what's been happening and it was pretty scary mostly, to hear about Ah Kong's condition. Seeing some of his things in his room made me feel sad. His clothes, medicine, toiletries...and my grandmother looks thinner than ever. I can feel her bony pelvic, arms and legs...pretty scary.

His ashes were thrown into the sea on SUnday morning, and unfortunately, i think i was somewhere above the north part of Australia.

Anyway, i just got back from melaka with my brothers. My sister drove us down there yesterday evening as she is studying there. It's about 2 + hours away by car. Then we drove back up today without her.

So, everything's okay...no worries! :)

Teoh Bian Lee (9/2/1925-2/11/2006)

dear everyone,

I'll be going back to Malaysia this Sunday. My grandfather just passed away Thursday morning at 8 am in the nursing home he has been at since the 2 operations he had over a couple of months ago. My dad said he woke up, asked for his Milo, asked for a shower, asked for a clean shirt. They turned him over, he took his last breath and he died. So it was a peaceful death. My dad was at the police station when I called him, getting clearance to get Ah Kong's body out of the nursing home. He sounded calm as usual but towards the end when I asked him how he was, whether he was okay, he didn't really answer me. My bro told me that when my dad got the news in the morning, he rushed up to tell my bro who had just gotten out of the shower and his face was red. My dad doesn't show much emotion but I know he's broken inside. When I first left for Australia, Ah Kong was crying, i was crying, my mum was crying...and i thought my dad wasn't. But when I hugged him, I heard this choking sound and i knew he was sad.

I was at work when I got the call. Just got back from lunch outside with my workmates. I saw "Private Call", and it was my bro. He was calling from his mobile phone (and i'm sure he's on Prepaid), and i was wondering why. And he said he was about to go for an interview. ANd I thought, wow..he must have something serious to tell me to be calling me at that time. But I didn't expect that.

I'm actually missing the memorial as I write this. Ah Kong...his body is lying in a coffin in his house and i know people are coming to see him. My maternal grandparents are also coming. TOmorrow's the funeral and then, he's going to be cremated as he wished. But i'm not going to be able to ever see his body ever again physically. I wished I could have gotten an earlier flight, i should have just taken a damn bus back from Singapore instead of waiting for a better connecting flight.

anywayyssss

i'm okay, so don't worry. Doesn't seem real...

too many deaths this year

november already!

hey everyone, long time no post. Feels like I'm about to write an email hahaha..

It's my brothers' birthday today!! no wait, actually it was yesterday (40 minutes ago as I write this). They're 22 ...this is a reminder to myself to send them an sms later to wish them. I wished they'd come online so I can voice chat with them!! Last spoke to one of my brothers about a week ago. They're attending job interviews now in M'sia.

Today was an amazing day!! Still working at the food laboratory Mondays to Fridays. Still looking for a more challenging job but it's been such great fun working there. Sometimes, i'm just laughing so much with some of my workmates till my guts ache and tears flow hahaha. Anyway, what's been particularly different is hanging out with one of my workmates who is a Seventh-Day Adventist. If you don't know what this is, it's another Christian denomination, some people say otherwise but to me, they're Christian. I've been following her every Wednesday for over a month now after work to her church for this hourly program going on there. It starts at about 7.30 pm, so we go back to her place first. I've really enjoyed spending time with her and it's been an eye-opening experience learning more about the SDA. Today, one of our other friends came and we just hung out till the church program started...it was really fun. He's a passionate Hillsong church-goer (Pentecostal), and she's a passionate SDA. No matter our differences, they have really encouraged me in a lot of ways at work by their speech, love for God and people and the sincerity of their hearts.

Feels like i'm going through another phase of my life at my current workplace coz they're the people I see almost everyday.

anyways...heading to bed now...zzzz...good nite!!!

=D

Oh what?!?

geeeezzz I can't believe Bobby Flynn has been kicked out of Australian Idol!!!

whatt????

yes, I follow Australian Idol...I don't get to watch it every week, like the recent one that passed. Honestly, I also think it's stupid in a way.

BUT i really liked Bobby Flynn...always loved it when he came up to sing!!! really did. He's so unique and original. And just so real. You could tell his sincerity and the fact that winning Idol is not what he's there for. He's the only contestant I've really truly enjoyed watching so far.

it's a sad day. I thought he'd make it all the way, or if not, to the final 2 at least. Now I think Jessica Mauboy is going to win. She's got an awesome voice.

Better future?

When I go back to Malaysia or just meet some Malaysians here or wherever, they just go on talking about how conditions back in Msia are not good and there's just no future. Over here, things are better, no racial bias like there, better education, pension, salary, work conditions etc. My former neighbours told me today how so many people just want to come over here for a better life. There's just no future in M'sia.

Someone told me he wouldn't want to raise his kids in Msia. Kids who'd grow up and hang out by going shopping or to karaoke. His perception of settling down in this place out of M'sia was not for a better financial future but i guess for his kids to realise "what life and living in this world truly is about"....i suppose he can't stand the M'sian mentality of everything and our living in this brickworld.

What can I say? I think I'm just fortunate to have been able to come to Australia to see, hear and talk to different people with different perspectives and yeah, it's a great country, like my 2nd home. But Malaysia is a beautiful country as well and I'm just really proud of being Malaysian, even though what I know of it is not very much. It hits me sometimes...what's my focus of getting out of M'sia? it is for my future? for my life whatever life means to ME? for the future of MY kids?

What's life really about anyway? to live and be happy?

I was watching "The Apprentice" just now on tv. Honestly, I find watching it fun and entertaining but it's always all about winning to the extent of speaking upwards about oneself and dissing someone who does a bad job. People just care for themselves and pleasing and sucking up to people they need to please.

So stupid. I'd never want to be on any show like the Apprentice.

Finally!!

yayy....I'm finally a Permanent Resident of Australia as of today. To be honest, feels not much different. I'll have to go get the new visa label from Immigration, I think and I'm not sure what to do after that.

anyway, i'll email to tell my family now..

=)

Goodbye

When I walk into the old familiar place,
I see emptiness
why is it so bare?
But memories I see
Memories I hear
The walls speak out to me as I walk past
Perhaps he is watching a movie on his computer
or sleeping his tiredness away.

My room is empty
How can I not sleep there again?
Goodbye you, and you and you
To the laundry room downstairs as well
How can I not come here again?
or open the mailbox again?
or get off the bus at the same place?

I'm sorry I didn't take care of you properly

Goodbye...i'll miss u.

Do Not Worry

Just been reading these verses. They're one of my favourite passages.

Matthew 6:25-34

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"

"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

almost goodbye

ok, i'm moving tomorrow!! but i don't have to officially hand over my keys till saturday....but I have to pack almost everything by early tomorrow morning. I'll spend the rest of the days till Saturday doing cleaning when I can...

...and that's the plan!

sounds organised but it's an illusion....really.