i'm really moving

and so i am moving out on thursday - have to take a day off from work. I was actually supposed to move out nov 27th (which is today) and wanted to ask for an extension, but couldn't get what i wanted coz i was too late. Anyway..

We managed to secure the place my aunt was aiming at and really wanted!

Ok, i will start packing tomorrow after work. I really had no time today.

let our speech be gracious, seasoned with salt

at this moment, my speech is playing on my mind. I think i've been like a "loose cannon ball" lately or actually, possibly my whole life (especially with my family I suppose, where I can let loose speech that expresses anger, annoyance or just totally meaningless speech which shows no care in the world - maybe this is okay for relaxation and laughing purposes). Maybe I can describe it as opinionated self-directed speech.

Anyway, something happened a few days ago which set my anger bells on. And I was talking to my lawyer-to-be friend about it. Have you ever watched legal tv shows of badgering lawyers who can make a witness cry? I really felt that and i was getting even angrier, practically matching his raised voice over the phone. But anger only was for that period. He was trying to shoot me down that i was in the wrong in his badgering tone (i know he doesn't mean it), but my arrogant self didn't want to accept it because I honestly didn't know it was wrong.

I was explaining my annoyance of something with someone today and again, i was kinda raising my voice to express it, as if it is such a huge problem. I still feel bad about talking like that, need to say sorry soon, even though I kinda know that my friend kinda knows how i'm like and not just this one aspect.

In terms of when i'm happy (especially giggling mood), i start using words that can be described as funny-rude. And as i think of something i just said today, i think i could have used another better word.

This is a great verse to always remind ourselves:
"Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that is may give grace to those who hear." Ephesians 4:29

"Lovely Complex"

I love this anime - it's my favourite!! =)

welll...it is the only anime i've ever really watched.

yes, i know, i don't look like the person who even watches anime and you are absolutely right. Never watched any of my brothers' downloaded anime or i wouldn't bother watching when my sister and brothers had it on on Astro (cable tv in malaysia). Thought they were boring - actually, i still do sort of. Never understood their fascination (or anyone else) for anime, and even things like computer games - thank goodness no one in my immediate family finds computer games fascinating.

Haven't finished watching it - 3 more episodes (24 in total and only 1 season). Been watching it bit by bit at my friend's place.

It's a very touching, funny story of a group of high school kids. The main characters are Otani (a very short boy 156 cm) and Koizumi (a very tall girl 172 cm) who are similar and have similar interests and are always fighting and arguing in the beginning but enjoy each other's company. Love story between both of them, basically. The way they interact is JUST SO FUNNNY....and also so touching. My friend can still cry after having watched it a few times.....

Kim Phuc

Today was my day off Sunday School, so took the opportunity to go visit Argyle's church as I had promised I would. Got my aunt to come along as well. It's an off-shoot of the church my current church was under, so the style is pretty much the same. But it's a family church whereas my church is a student church, and being a family church, the service was over in just over an hour...The sermon was very succint and to the point, easy to relate to but still faithfully taken out of a passage in context.

The pastor brought up this photo:



A famous photo of Kim Phúc from the Vietnam War which won the Pulitzer prize. The picture taken in 1972, shows her at about age nine running naked on the street after being severely burned on her back by a bomb attack.

"In 1996, she gave a speech at the United States Vietnam Veterans Memorial on Veterans Day. During the speech she said that we cannot change the past but can work for a peaceful future. After the speech, Reverend John Plummer, a Vietnam War Veteran, talked to some of his old friends and got them to ask Kim if she would like to meet him, for he stated that he was the one who ordered the bombing. She accepted and they met briefly and Kim forgave Plummer. " (Wikipedia)

Ethan Bortnick

Check out this awesome Jay Leno interview !!

6-year old piano genius - he's so cute and funny especially when he talks about his distaste for rock music, ie. Aerosmith. His ability to comprehend questions and answer them and his confidence in front of the camera is amazing.

His website: http://www.ethansmusicsite.com/

Cause to worry though about child "exploitation"...

what a dramatic day

it started from around lunch time. .didn't think it'd turn out like this!

Today I kinda felt like I'm going to move soon even though I haven't started any form of packing except collect a few boxes. My aunt had a more dramatic day because she was told she had to move out TOMORROW by 5 pm. After being given an extension till the 22nd (when she was given notice to move out by the 16th), they told her today that she had to move out tomorrow. Details aside, the real estate agent she has to deal with aren't that nice. And i'm not the only one who thinks so.

We went to see a couple of places after work, and we'll put in our application for one. The place we were aiming at, the current tenants aren't allowing it to be opened for inspection till they move out on the 21st, so basically, we still haven't confirmed a place yet.

But it's okay...my aunt was surprisingly calm throughout, even on the phone as she was telling me stuff. She's amazing but yes, what's the point of getting stressed anyway?

There are so so so many people looking for a place to rent now...it's crazzzzzyyyyy.....whyyyy, it's just the middle of november!!! last saturday, we went to see this unit on the 1st floor open for inspection, and there was a long long line down the stairs and out the front door.

I've got a whole heap of her stuff now at my place. I suddenly feel the burden of packing, especially taking into account the amount of crap i have. It looks okay but when the packing actually starts, it's going to seem like the boxes never enddd...

definitely not fun to move...but i am kinda looking forward to living in a new place with my aunt.

moving again sooon!

yes, that's right, i'm going to type out my letter to give notice to the real estate agent by tonight and email it out. I'm going to move in with my aunt just to Randwick (which is the next suburb). Been looking at a few places from the outside and inside and the key thing in our search was location. Next, not a crappy old place and not too expensive. We're aiming at this place which is still being occupied by current tenants. There's probably going to be an inspection of the unit this Saturday and my aunt told me to get ready some documents...we have to get that place! Coz she has to move out of her current place in 2 weeks.

Anyway, been living by myself for a year and close to 2 months now and it's been okay. Friends ask me, so do u feel lonely? And my answer is no...except early this year when i was not feeling too good. But just for a little while. But generally..if there's no friends, then i guess of course, one'll get lonely! It's like someone saying Sydney (or whatever place it is ) is so boring. There's nothing to do.

So many people to think about and so many things to do, so there's no time to dwell on loneliness. Friends to meet, new friends to make, family to see...
But anyway, no judging. Different people are different. Adaptation levels, attachment to the past or old good friends...many many factors.

So, back to topic.

I am moving soon! still doesn't feel like it coz i haven't done any packing at all except collect a box!

Anyway it'll be nice to live with someone again. A new step, not to step into blindly but being aware of changes to come, and working on other-person centredness.

another year

It's been one year already since my grandfather passed away (nov 2) and exactly one year when i first flew back to malaysia.

I remember that early morning and what I was doing then, and the days around that time. It's weird how much has changed since then. I wasn't sure what to expect at the start of the 25th year of my life but I had a small hope of things to be. But unfortunately, it didn't turn out the way I was thinking, not even a little. An initial terrible desire kindled into flames and stepped into without thinking but ending in a black mass of extreme disappointment.

It's not cancer, not about the fact that someone died. Everyone has their own personal depressive times. But I think God was really gracious in allowing such things to happen to me, like He had to take drastic action to pull me out of a fake paradise I stepped into according to my own limited foresight.

It hurt but this year has been full of new challenges and learnings. In church today, we were asked to think of a life-changing event. I would say this was a life-changing event for me.

Looking forward to this next year of my life :)

Argyle

Had dinner (actually, just hors-d'oeuves - however u spell it) this evening with a senior grandpa named Argyle. My mum met him a few times at her Rotary Club functions back in Malaysia a few months ago when he was there and told him about me and he rang me up a few times. I couldn't meet up with him before and forgot to ring him back. But he rang me up again last week (after he had a surgery....felt bad after he said that) and he feels bad if we don't meet up after he promised my mum he'll look me up. So he invited me to some restaurant website launch he was invited to.

Anyway, it was nice to finally meet him. He sure can talk on and on and on..=P And I try my best to understand what he's saying.

But what I want to say is that he is a really nice person with a big heart and most importantly, a heart for God. He told me more about himself and the way he sees and thinks about certain things and asked me questions about myself. He finds great joy in just helping people, he treats and talks to everyone the same, no matter who you are he'll take an interest in what u're interested in and not just want to do his own thing. etc etc When he said that, I was reminded of what the apostle Paul said (in the bible) : 1 Corinthians 10:25-33

It's interesting how we can just walk by someone and not think anything, or wonder what to talk about with someone new ....but not realising there's so much to find out about someone. So much that one has gone thru in life, no matter who u are. Not that it's so easy to just talk to everyone but God's love compels us to owe no one anything except to love one another (Romans 13:8a, personalised).

Some recent photos

With some of my uni mates @ Mel C's housewarming, Newtown.

She just moved out of her family home to live with 4 other random people already living in this house. Theme: Euro-trash ( she just went on a 1-month holiday in July to Europe, so I guess trying to relive her love for Europe)

Mel & her best friend, Jo...trying to be Euro trash.

As for me, no idea what to wear.That night, when I was driving home, saw an accident on the road. It was my first time seeing someone lying on the road unconscious. I'm not sure what happened but I hope he's still alive.

With Jason and 3 of the church kids.

i like this photo coz it's simple and casual! The more I see the kids every week, i just love them more and more, even though sometimes they don't want to behave. But children are such blessings from God. They're so small and "innocent" and have such simple minds. They listen to you when you are firm and all the more, if you are kind. Parenting is serious business, teaching our children is serious business. Every week is challenging in learning how to teach the kids God's Word, and working out what was good and could have been done better. The world will shape us here and there and twist us according to its wants, but God's TRUTH is never changing. I realise more how important God's truth is in our life first, letting it shape us, before we can even teach it to anyone. It's a journey of perseverance and endurance, toil and discipline - difficult but worth it. Keep telling ourselves that!

I love kids. I think I want 6 (hahah...i'm just joking ok)

Happy birthday to me and my cousin-in-law, Vignesh!

His bday's just a day before mine. My bible study group threw us a surprise - thanks guys :) I know he really appreciated it and so did my cousin (who's in Malaysia) !! I'm glad that he could come instead of spending his birthday by himself and meet my lovely bible study group family.

Bible Study Group Picture with Vig.

My little girls.

Me & the boys

Can't believe the year is ending. I'm like "mother" of the group (they call me that, can u believe it)but even then, I've learned so much from each and every one of them. They're all so special and different, with great stories to tell of their lives. Nothing is too small or unimportant. Even though our lives may diverge, I'm so glad that we're all part of the great one body in Christ and that we're in a journey together, forever.

The story of Joseph

I love this story!! --> Actually, it's not a story - it's a true historical account!!

Recently, we taught the kids at Sunday School the story about Joseph and how God was able to turn the bad things that happened to Joseph into good.

If you're unfamiliar with the story of Joseph (one of the great patriachs of the Old Testament - Genesis 37-50), let me give you a brief overview.
1) Joseph, being one of the 12 sons of Jacob and his favourite son, was despised by his brothers, who then planned on killing him, but in the end sold him to traders as a slave to Egypt. As a slave to Potiphar, an officer of the Pharaoh, Joseph found favour in his sight and was made the overseer of the house.
2) But Potiphar's wife started to lust after him. Joseph refused her advances and she lied to her husband about what happened, making Potiphar angry enough to throw Joseph in prison. However, in prison, God gave him favour in the sight of the prisonkeeper and was put in charge of all the prisoners.
3) Later on, God helped Joseph interprete dreams of two prisoners who worked with the Pharaoh. After 2 years in prison, he was asked to interprete the Pharaoh's dream, and the Pharaoh seeing how wise he was, made him the Governor of Egypt (2nd in charge after the Pharaoh). Because he was the governor, he was able to bring his family to Egypt during the dreadful time of the famine.

And so, God was with Joseph all this while....even though things seemed bad, God had a purpose for Joseph.

Anyway, why I find this story so fascinating is the depth of emotions in Joseph. As I was reading the passage, it hit me how much suffering Joseph went through. And how much he trusted God and truly forgave his brothers for what they had done to him because he could see that God had a purpose for it all.

"Gen 41: 51 Joseph named his firstborn Manasseh and said, "It is because God has made me forget all my trouble and all my father's household."

Joseph is already Governor and his brothers came to Egypt to seek grain, but was accused of being spies by Joseph, whom they didn't recognise.
"42: 22 Reuben replied, "Didn't I tell you not to sin against the boy? But you wouldn't listen! Now we must give an accounting for his blood." 23 They did not realize that Joseph could understand them, since he was using an interpreter. 24 He turned away from them and began to weep, but then came back and spoke to them again."

After his brothers brought back Benjamin as requested:
"42:29 As he looked about and saw his brother Benjamin, his own mother's son, he asked, "Is this your youngest brother, the one you told me about?" And he said, "God be gracious to you, my son." 30 Deeply moved at the sight of his brother, Joseph hurried out and looked for a place to weep. He went into his private room and wept there. 43: 31 After he had washed his face, he came out and, controlling himself, said, "Serve the food." "

He wept loudly again when he finally revealed himself to his brothers, after seeing that they had changed. He wept again on his father's shoulders when he sees him after so many years. And when his father died, Joseph fell on his father's face and wept over him.

I think the account of Joseph is so real, the emotional pain vividly expressed. It's such an amazing story. I think a film of the story would be equally as touching. The depth of his love for his father, his brothers after years of separation and pain.

Memories

~Memories of New College friends ~

I was just looking at all these digital photos that i recently managed to get off Newton and was just thinking about the time when he and Anne came all the way to Singapore to visit and then they and Guan came up to Malaysia for a short trip. Newtown was actually very very kind and printed out hard copies for us last year and where he's from (Shenzhen in China), they give very nice little photo holder album things. And I was looking at the dates - early Feb 2006! Time has definitely flown past so quickly. And much has happened and i'm still not yet the age of our big brother (and senile), Jere when I started at college 2002 and he was already there...hahaha...

By the way, Jimmy Choi, if you're reading this, I just wanted to say "happy belated birthday" and I hope that birds and China and wherever else you may go will continue to enrich your life in many many ways. Happy belated birthday 10/10 to Jere too (how can i ever forget his bday esp the time when we were all watching the FIFA world cup and the time was 10:10 and he exclaimed at that, trying to point something about it - i knew he meant his birthday straight away!). Anyway, he won't read this, but happppy happy 31st Jere!! I wonder if he's still senile =P

Thinking about Kailing, weihseun, Ruthie, Jodie, Joni, Kimmy, Sahil, Mahsa, Dilan, Alex Law etc etc...I cannot believe more than 5 years have gone past.

Newton, Guan, Kenneth, Pey Pey, Anne & me after having satay in Kajang, M'sia

funny advert on the MRT in Singapore

~ At Manly~

A photo of some of my workmates: Anita (work experience only and she's left us), Ivy, me & Leva about 3 weeks ago. We're having lunch at Manly beach as a farewell to Anita. I'm kinda immune to the name "manly" but i wonder why they even named it that in the first place. =P

It was really great to have Anita with us, she helped us so much and I really enjoyed our conversations. I wished she could have stayed longer!

People get fired, or just leave.

A couple of people got "fired" just in the last couple of weeks.

And it was one of the ladies upstairs' last day last Friday...before her 6-month maternity leave. Don't know if she'll come back, or extend her leave, but at least she knows the job is still waiting for her when she comes back. Not always the case though. She's been here close to 14 years too.

Anyway, felt really sad Friday close to the end of the day. My friend wondered why I was so, am i that close to her? - I don't know, change that involves a loss is sad , I even felt pricked and "shocked" when the KFC near my house was bulldozed to build a road, or when shops I'm so used to seeing close down or when my brothers just left me for 1 1/2 months on holiday. When it comes to people, I guess I'm really like my late grandfather.

However, back at work again on the first day of the week today and it was okay. Not sad anymore.

Challenge conference last weekend

A hint from Joni to update my blog haha...ok i'm finally doing it. Last weekend, we had a long weekend coz of Labour Day and I was just away at a Christian conference called Challenge conference.

With some of the girls just before our departure back to Sydney!


It was challenging as the name says. The talks were great and may I use this opportunity to commend anyone who reads here to listen to Phillip Jensen's talks. He is such a fantastic speaker. He is like a wise grandfather, witty and sharp and his humour is just impeccable. His talks are faithful and in context to what the Bible says and he just speaks in such a refreshing manner, recounting personal experiences and also drawing in issues from current and past events of the world.

check out:
http://afes.causeway-online.info/repository/afes-resource/NTE%20Index.html
http://www.cathedral.sydney.anglican.asn.au/pages/downloads-raquo/archive.php

However, ultimately, to exclude other speakers whom we think are not that "great" in comparison with Phillip Jensen would be a biased thing to do. It's not the speaker that matters but who the speaker is pointing the audience to --> Jesus and his gospel.

Another eventful thing that happened that weekend was that my car battery went flat at the time we were supposed to leave. Think my friend who parked my car forgot to switch the little headlight off and i didn't even notice later on. Oh well, i wasn't worried ...coz i knew there would be guys to help me hahah...what are they for anyway... =P just joking

I miss my ex-workmates

I really do.

I just spoke to 3 of them tonight, actually attempted to phone 3 more. Oh it was so good to talk to them, and laugh with them. One just had to say my name and i started laughing. Hearing his voice was just too funny. ANd Jenish , my dear Jenish, the married mother who now stays at home looking after her kids. Talking to her on the phone was like back to old times in the lab. Christine says the lab is now quiet without us.

It'll never be the same again. We're all in different areas now, doing different things, working or not working. I really loved working coz of them. The environment was fantastic PLUS i didn't have the stress of work responsibilities that came with it because I was not a permanent staff, just a casual everyday person. Job was quite carefree. I didn't have to control myself too much, and it was so easy to be myself.

Who we work with is just so important and I really feel it. But all that being said, wherever we go, we need to do our best to get to know people, befriend them, care for them, treat them like how God wants us to treat them. Do our best no matter the difficulty of circumstances unknown to others.

We're talking about meeting up next month. Hopefully it can be organised.

me own a car?

My carpooling friend has found a new job =(

Okay, I'm happy for her that FINALLY she has done what she's been wanting to do and I hope it'll be a great move for her. But at the same time, it'll be sad. No more friend in the morning and after work. It was really nice to get to know her better ever since I started working around this area 6 months ago. She lives near me and works near where I work, that's why I started going to work with her.
Oh well, so going to be driving everyday to work now. Not that I really mind even though it'll be nice to save cost too what with petrol and toll. I like driving and it's ONLY 19km one way!

Yenyi & I having lunch with other work friends (not in pic)

And here are a couple of photos of my car which I bought in May. I'll display them here since I just finally showed them to my family. Especially for those of you who want to know how my car looks like (I'm hinting u, weihseun hahah). Can't wait to sit in my car when i pick u frm the airport if u come visit next year huh? hahah...your bum is most welcome anytime... =P




It's quite a good car. My dad paid for it and recommended it. His friend who bought it says it's pretty stable and it's pretty popular in Malaysia, it seems but pretty expensive. But it's cheaper over here in Australia.I went from knowing ZILCH about cars to at least learning something. I still don't know how to open my bonnet or check for battery water... oh oh..Need to learn this.

It's been great having a car. The car has served me well as well as served a lot of other bums well hahah. I didn't want a car initially when my dad suggested it coz i saw no need for a car. After all, it was going to increase my expenses! I could very well take the bus to work. But yeah, As Jean put it, it's a "ministry car" - very well put, Jeano. Serving people.

Thank you car, thank you dad, thank you God.

Remembering & Forgiving

Last Sunday at church, Ivan commented on this picture that he had seen and I thought what he said was so insightful.




Bourne remembers everything and forgives nothing.
But because of Jesus,
God remembers nothing and forgives us everything.

death

Just got off the phone with my mum and she told me one of the elders in our church back home, FGA KL - Dr. Koh Eng Kiat. He passed away last month. I was pretty shocked.

It's so sad. Death.

He and Dr. Ang Chui Lai, the other elder, were 2 men I was used to seeing sitting in front. They started the church and sometimes they'd be at the door of the main hall, welcoming us with a warm smile and giving us the warmest handshake.

Anyone can die all of a sudden, you never know. Appreciate them while they're around. Things like this remind me to pick up the phone and call people, especially family members I don't speak to much.

Long day!

Here I am still sitting at my computer and it's 12:42 am and I haven't even taken a shower or done what I need to do for tomorrow after work. The reason I'm still sitting here is coz I'm talking to my brother on Skype now - and at the moment, he says he is dying by paying $70 in petrol every week and he is more interested in chinese songs but he insists that he still listens to english songs. And he is trying to find that Wang lee Hom song, the piano sheet and he is going to try to play on the piano. Feel like playing all of a sudden it seems. hahahah...suddenly, wants to touch the piano (before don't like the piano). haahah Anyways..

Work today was really exhausting - i was rushing towards the end probably coz of my inefficiency at the start, sheesh. Tired.

Ok i'm off the phone with my brother now. Was playing him some chinese songs I have through the mic. Ok I really should shower now.

******************************

I felt really sad a few times earlier this evening realising how good a friend Guan is to me and the fact that I don't know when I'll ever have face-to-face chats with him again. Guan is someone who so genuinely cares for his friends, he is even concerned for our well-being even when he was far away in oxford. I know that even though there can be months that we don't talk, I can always count on him and when we do talk again, it's not just funny nonsense but deep meaningful stuff. Sometimes I think I don't even appreciate him as a friend but it humbles me to the point of tears when i realise how much he does. It was good to spend time with him just now, and going to sleep late is worth it. It's funny coz he was asking about my brothers and sister and parents. And I was saying how one brother is so so so busy at work and busy to talk. Then when I come back at midnight after dropping Guan back, I see miss calls on Skype from my brother. I call him back and he talks to me like he's tired and doesn't feel like talking, as usual. Funny boy...I miss my brothers and sister. It was just over a year ago that Guan left Sydney for good and almost a year ago that my brothers left sydney for good on Aug 31st.

So much has happened since then but time flies so quick, it seems not that long ago.

Arrival of the Guan

The weekend's over already =(

I can't believe I'm starting to feel like how I didn't want to feel.

You know, when people start moaning that it's Monday, or the Monday blues as they call it. And when Friday comes, the day just seems so much better coz it's just Friday, and it's almost the weekend! "Oh, it's Friday, don't really feel like working". And then you see those forwarded emails about people's reactions on different days, someone even sent this email with a picture of a baby scrunching its face in happiness coz it's Friday. One of the guys who works in the warehouse where I work says Wednesday is speed bump day. You gotta slow down till speed bump day and it just gets faster after that.

I think I'm just enjoying what I've been doing and people i've been meeting outside work so much, more than having to be at work. But work's interesting, not complaining.

This week, one of my very good friends, Guan arrived from Singapore for a short 1 1/2 week holiday! It's been great to see him again and he's been going out to eat at a lot of his favourite eating places here. When we first saw him, thought he lost weight! 2 months in Singapore after 1 dreadful year in the UK ( hahaha....he said he SUFFERED there in Oxford with the TERRIBLE food, TERRIBLE weather and boring people...imagine him exaggerating) and I still felt like he lost weight from whence i last saw him. And then after hot pot yesterday evening, we saw that his stomach had expanded to the size we were used to hahaha... Feels great going to yum cha and hot pot with Guan again - feels like old times!